Friday, 21 June 2013

Stop Expecting

  
I thought I should add a personal touch this week and share my story- just so we can to know each other better; how do you like the sound of that? So here is my story: I recently joined WhatsApp- thanks to the genius who raised alarm bells to the service providers about how much money they were losing through the unlimited supply of data for only R60 per month that came with BIS. Well, too be fair we still have BBM at R59 per month with the BAS, but unfortunately some inglorious mugger decided to take my best friend’s blackberry and I was with no choice but to join the WhatsApp revolution.  So as a newbie on WhatsApp, one day I decided to just go through my contacts to see who is who in the zoo and I happened to come across this picture:

BIS and BAS stand for Blackberry Internet Service and Blackberry Absolute Service respectively; not common sense huh? Anyway to say the least, the picture didn't have much significance at that moment but I decided to save it anyway because that is something I do. I am not sure why I do it though, apart from thinking that they might come in handy one day. I guess it's just instinct. Yes, let's call it that. Anyway, I saved it and forgot about it until last Sunday. Let’s just say I had too much expectations Sunday, and they were not necessarily high expectation- but none were met. First I went to church and I was very excited we finally have a nice big venue after months of uncertainty and hardship.  Oh well, it turned out big is not always good as i could barely hear anything with the echo in that venue. As expected, after hopeless attempts to actively focus on what was happening, the mind just ends up racing all over God knows what. 

Anyway, I went to Mzoli’s afterwards thinking my day was about to get better. I was happy to be with my chommas and was looking forward to the meat too until I saw the queue to the butchery. You would swear it was teenagers queuing to get Justin Bieber's autograph on their parts. Fortunately, my chommas are well connected so they made it to the cashier within 15 minutes and I thought to myself in no longer than an hour I will be sinking my teeth in that sticky marinated tender steak. Oh well, expectation is one thing and reality is a totally different thing. Four hours later, there was neither meat, nor a place to sit. So I decided to practice what I preach and called it quits! 

I was upset. As I was driving home I found myself deep in the conversation of why small and medium-sized enterprises fail. I won't bore you with the details of that conversation but to say the least, I gave them a zero on customer service- they operate on a take it you or leave it system. Well, that is just my opinion. So, shortly after I got to that place I call ‘home’ (for now) I got a message from my friend telling me about a UCT Confessions page that seems to be a hit. So I went like “What! Isn't that something for small institutions like them WSUs and Varsity College?"  I am the kind of person who likes putting things into context. As a result by the time I went to take a look at it, I already knew what I was going to find there- big mistake! Once again, I found myself disappointed and I had no one to blame but myself for the expectations I created all by myself. I mean, as I browsed through it I couldn't help but keep inserting the words "Dear Sis Dolly" before each "confession".


As I went through the events of the day in my head later on, I realized there was only one constant in all these scenarios that  ended in disappointments and that was my expectations. Had I stopped expecting and just went with the flow (which is quite a challenge for me); I would have saved myself from all this emotional turmoil. So I decided to take that note in the picture there a little bit personal and started a new chapter of not expecting. It sounds really simple; if someone offends you, do not expect them to apologise otherwise you might grow grey hair waiting. Like Jesus did, just ask God to forgive them (or in my case, just write them off) and move on. If you like someone, do not expect them to like you back- it's just not fair. Let’s face it now; you too do not like everyone who likes you. Share your problems with people because you find it therapeutic, but do not expect them to solve them for you or give advice because the reality is, for as long as they are not part of the equation, the solution will always look simpler on their eyes. Trust me o this one; but do not expect me to be not wrong. 

No comments:

Post a Comment